My Awakening

Besides journaling, I had also begun to firm up my meditation practice through guided and self-meditations. Meditation is a practice that is widely used for different purposes like releasing stress, relaxation, and physical and emotional healing. In spirituality, meditation is used for similar purposes but to also connect with one’s divinity. I use meditation for those various reasons but more specifically to quiet the clutter in my mind, so that I can begin to perceive the divine. My meditation practice has since evolved to a place I never imagined when I first started. If I go a day without meditating, I feel out of balance, disconnected, and out of alignment. I will discuss this and other topics in more detail later as soon as I can move past the introductory part of this journal.

As I mentioned in my previous post, information and answers started flowing into my existence in response to the questions I was asking, in a way I did not anticipate, in both simple and complex ways. For instance, I would begin to meet new spiritual teachers, healers, coaches, and mentors online, without having made any efforts to search for them. It’s like they were drawn to me in a way, as an energetic response to the request I made to the universe. They each shared messages and teachings that resonated with me. Even though some of the teachings and concepts were wildly new to me, my heart was drawn to them because they resonated deeply with my soul.

Some answers I sure received directly from Source, through my intuition and inner voice, as these were the only channels that were open for me then. Others came in more unique and unexpected ways like how I would ponder over a question, to soon get an answer through something someone randomly said, or something I saw on a billboard whilst driving, or a chance event of me tuning into a radio station and a song comes on that speaks the exact words I needed to hear at that very moment, and my heart pauses for a second in disbelief.

Anyway, what surprised me though is the speed at which these answers came or the speed at which I was led to places I needed to go to find the answers. At that time, I did not know why but now I realize it’s because I had energetically begun to open myself up for these messages to be channelled through to me and then little synchronicities began to happen.

As things progressed, it became apparent that some of the answers I looked for, especially the complex ones, had no predetermined limits or boundaries. The answers were journeys on themselves. For example, if I had questions about my purpose and why I came, I was taken through a little journey to discover that answer. If I wanted answers about my past or present unpleasant situations it would not be a simple yes or no answer, I would be guided to that answer through a process of self-discovery so profound that nothing in my bone would negate that experience.

But for the most part I was taught a lot of things that I had never in my wildest dreams imagined could come into my awareness. I learned that our true nature as human beings is that we are essentially energy. We are spiritual beings incarnated temporarily in human bodies, living a temporary life. We are not just our minds and bodies. When it comes to the affairs of our lives and how we show up, our energy is everything. We call things, attract, and manifest things into our existence through energy. Therefore, if we want to change or heal anything permanently in our lives, we need to address that challenge at a deep energetic level otherwise any change we try to effect is superficial and the results are also just skin deep.

I learned a lot of things that kept me busy. The learnings were also coupled with a lot of healing at the same time, which allowed me to continuously shred what is inauthentic within me, to let go, and to embrace a new way of being and living. For example, one of my coaches uses a transformation method focused on using the power of the mind, to not only consciously create the life you want but to heal deep emotional and mental scars as well. She uses hypnosis to delve into the subconscious mind where all the past trauma, pain, and limiting beliefs are stored. The point is to bring them to the surface, release and heal them. I would be hypnotized by her every day of the week for like 8 weeks or so & a lot of stuff came up that needed to be addressed. Many other teachers also took me through a similar process which combines teaching and spiritual healing.

But why healing? I learned that the reason why we find ourselves in very difficult situations which make us feel stuck is because of, not only the way we perceive ourselves but the way we perceive the world and the environment around us. The way we perceive ourselves and our environment is usually a result of our childhood programming, or the thoughts,  beliefs, and habits we adopted from, or were taught to us by those who raised us including the society around us; religion, tradition, cultural beliefs, norms, etc.

Depending on each individual and their journey, these deeply ingrained thoughts, personal beliefs, perspectives, habits, and personas shape the way we see the world, and for the majority of people that’s where the core cause of problems emanates: the programming of the subconscious mind. The painful part is that most people are not consciously aware of their thinking habits and how their personal experiences are a direct result of the way they think, let alone the fact that for the most part, these thoughts are not their original thoughts. They have learned and adopted these beliefs or conditioning from their parents or caretakers or a person of authority in their lives and have therefore formed opinions, beliefs, habits, and personalities based on those beliefs. These beliefs and habits also greatly influence what we think is possible or not, what we think we are capable of or aren’t. We create our life experiences based on the conditioning of the mind. For example one of my own limiting subconscious beliefs was the belief that money is not enough; money does not grow on trees; money is the root of all evil; money is hard to get therefore you have to work hard and break your back to get money; financial abundance is only for the limited lucky or special few; and other variants of the same beliefs such as; if you want financial security you have to go to school, earn a degree and work a 9-5 job to achieve that. I did not know that these subconscious beliefs were the reason I could not experience any true financial freedom and abundance in my life. I was not even consciously aware of some of those thoughts until I had to dig deep to find out what influences the way I perceive and experience money in my life. If you asked me where I get those beliefs, it goes back to not only what I was taught, but what I also observed in my family situations around money when I was growing up. I consequently and subconsciously adopted that as ‘gospel truth’ and ‘just the way it is’ about money. If I needed to change my experience about money I had to start changing the way I think and feel about money, because ultimately what I think, feel, and believe is what I will ultimately attract and experience in my life.

The biggest part of spiritual work requires healing. Healing means releasing and letting go of our limited subconscious thoughts and beliefs which are the core cause of individual & humanity’s problems. We do that by first shining the light of our consciousness into those dark painful parts of ourselves which make us feel stuck. The willingness to look at, instead of running away from painful memories and or past experiences, or childhood conditioning, for instance, is what facilitates the healing process.

Getting in touch with our true authentic self so that we can live in our highest potential requires that we open ourselves to this healing process. Only then can we begin to come into alignment with who we truly are as divine beings of love and light. But most people shy away from this work because they’re scared or fearful of what might just come up. Sometimes, even if they’re aware, most people simply do not want to ‘face their demons’. They think it’s just too painful to deal with. They brush them off as ‘just how things are’ and therefore the opportunity to heal is lost. But little do they know that fear is just that; False Evidence Appearing as Real. It only takes a little practice of observing our thoughts and emotional patterns and deciding for ourselves if those have a place in our lives. That’s what defines conscious living. Spiritual practice is about living in the present moment and observing ourselves, our thought patterns and our reactions to things that trigger us, instead of living on autopilot and repeating the same patterns and habits we so desperately wish to change.

The painful truth I have had to come to terms with in my journey is the fact that we are creators of our own reality, whether we see it, believe it, or don’t. Everything, every event, and every experience is a manifestation of the thoughts, especially the subconscious thoughts that we hold in our minds. Whether we believe it or not our subconscious mind runs the show when it comes to our life experiences. However, we also do have the ability and power to shift our thoughts, beliefs, and patterns by re-wiring our brains to think differently. By recognizing that every experience begins with a thought and that if we want to change our life experiences we have to effect the changes at the level of thought.  The power to change and transform is inherent within all of us. We do not necessarily need anything outside ourselves to achieve this. We only need to become fully aware of our internal state of affairs and set the intention to change and transform our experiences. Healing is also a continuously ongoing process for as long as we are alive. No matter where we are in life and what we have achieved, we are never done until we are done and checked out of this physical plain. If you wish to experience exponential personal growth, learn great new things, expand and achieve new and greater levels of abundance you must rest assured that healing will always be necessary to get there, healing of your limited thinking capacities of what your brain tells you is impossible. This is the Universe of infinite potential and limitless possibilities, the only thing stopping us from achieving anything is our minds telling us it’s not possible. Therefore, there is always something new to learn and something new to experience, always.

Once we earnestly allow ourselves to begin to become aware of our conditioned thoughts and feelings regarding any topic at all, whether it is about money, health, work, relationships, or whatever is troubling us, we will always be guided to the answers and what needs to be healed within us. We will begin to heal and come into alignment with who we truly are. This is what is called awareness or conscious living. Awakening happens when we do this.

And the universal guidance runs as deep as we are ready to step up and embrace it. We are never alone in the process of healing and re-creation, but we are required to become active participants in our healing process. No magic pill is going to drop down into our brains and cause us to all of a sudden start thinking differently, in the absence of our conscious observation and engagement.

However, as challenging as letting go of our pain, fears, and limiting beliefs may sometimes seem to be, the Universe/God/ Source energy has placed within and outside ourselves a lot of help, which I for one, was never aware of until I started the work. But once we’re aware of what’s at our disposal, our healing process begins to speed up and each time it becomes easier and easier to peel the layers.

My intention through this journal is to share and discuss various topics as I feel guided or inspired to, especially those that have a profound impact on my own transformation journey. I will also share how I discovered my true purpose and quit my 8-5 job to align with that purpose.